"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” Isaiah 30:21
If you were to ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up as a teenager approaching my high school graduation, I would have said a wedding dress designer. I had aspirations to be a famous wedding dress designer and move to New York City where I would throw the most elaborate fashion shows and have beautiful gowns of white flowing down the catwalk stamped with my name on it. But after one year at the University of North Texas Fashion program, I quickly found out that was not a good fit for me. So I had a change of plans.
If you were to ask me what I wanted to be in my early 20's I would have said a Contemporary Christian Singer. Music is in my bones and in my blood. I have grown up singing and considering I named this blog, "My Heart's Song" it is still very much a part of my life. So I pursued it wholeheartedly because when I set my mind to something, watch out! It's all or nothing! So I went back to college and pursued a degree in Music. I had a wonderful time singing, traveling, and winning awards and even went so far as to try out for American Idol about 5 years ago at the brand new Dallas Cowboys stadium. But that didn't quite work out either. My husband said "You know you don't need a degree or a record label to sing for the Lord, He just wants you to use your gift for Him". So after settling into a role of part time worship leader at my church, I had another change of plans.
Only this time I was in my late 20's and I began to wonder...What am I going to be when I grow up? I should know the answer to this question by now! I am married with children and supposed to be helping guide my children to making this decision. I held so many odd jobs in my life hoping to find that answer: retail, weight loss counselor, personal banker, fast food, preschool teacher, marketing, collections, wedding film artist, and the list goes on...
But here I am at 30 years old and I am a published author with a calling on my life to write. Someone at church asked me yesterday, "So how is the book coming along? Is this like ...the dream? The goal you have always aspired to?"
No, actually its not! This was not anything I planned, more like a pure act of obedience! I never in my life thought I would see myself as a writer. I never thought I would find myself where I am today. But here I am!
For this season of my life, God has called me to be an open book, literally. God has put on my heart to write! God has been behind me saying as it does in the above verse, "This is the way; walk in it." Trust me I have fought Him through this process and it hasn't been easy. This ministry God is leading me into takes mountains of trust on my part, because it is taking me completely out of my comfort zone. But that is how I know I am able to do this. Because whatever God brings me to, He will give me the grace to bring me through it. I don't know how long this season I am in will last, but I know for now I am right where I am suppose to be. God has changed my plans. Too many times than I would like to count sometimes. But what is important to note here is that I was able to put myself in a place spiritually to be ready for any changes God had planned for me.
I can confidently say, that I believe I am walking in God's perfect will for my life right now. I feel it, I see it, I sense it, I know it. It is an amazing experience to know that I am walking in obedience to God's calling on my life. I no longer need to know what I am going to be when I grow up, all God wants me to do is be obedient. My vocation does not define me, who God says I am is what defines me.
Is there a change of plans God is trying to make in your life? I know it might seem scary, but just as He says in His Word "His yoke is easy and His burden is light". Truly it is! Stop trying to make things happen in your own strength and begin making things happen in His strength!
Check out this beautiful song by Bethel, "You Make Me Brave". Because it takes someone very brave to allow God to interrupt their life and change their plans. But I promise you won't regret it!
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What a great testimony and what a wonderful song! It ministered to me tonight!
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