It took me about two weeks to finish this series. We had a vacation, home renovations and a lot of setbacks, but it allowed me plenty of time to really think about how I wanted to finish this blog on finishing the race. Right now it feels as though I am in the middle of a bunch of things and I really had to sit and reflect on what I've finished to properly put this into perspective for me and you.
Personally, I have gone through and come out the other side of an extremely difficult season in my life. Last Spring I was having some serious issues with anxiety, doubt, fear and lost all confidence in my abilities in who I was as a child of God. I had let my spirit become so burdened that I was in a scary place, I felt far from God, my family and like I was the only person in the world going through this. But you know what's funny? I was never alone! God was with me every step of the way! I got to the very bottom of my barrel, so that I had no where to look but up. I looked from side to side, friends, family, doctors, and weaned through solicited and unsolicited advice. But when God got me to a place where ALL else failed and I had to look to Him, ask Him and trust Him...that is when my life began to change.
It was not an overnight healing, but a process. I had years of bad thought patterns, behaviors and mindsets become so rooted, I had to began pulling those weeds out by the roots. There was some soul-searching, Bible-reading, praising and rejoicing along with crying, feeling like I failed and weak moments. But even on my "bad days", even when it was hard, I made a decision to me and God and said out loud, "My God has not given up on me, my family has not given up on me and I will not give up. I was created for a purpose, a calling and I will fight to fulfill the ministries put before me now and in the future. If Satan can get me to believe the LIE that I am weak, inadequate or useless, then I will be. If I remember that "Greater is He that is in me, then he in the world..(1 John 4:4) then I have confidence that whatever comes my way will not EVER be bigger than my God!!"When you begin to live like that, claim that and walk in that, things have to change!!! There is no room for fear where there is faith!!
I am not perfect, I won't be until I get to heaven. But if I can embrace the fact that God loves me throughout my imperfections and believe that my moments of weakness does not disappoint Him or stop Him from fighting for me, I can become more than a conqueror. I believe I can say I am healed, healed from crippling anxiety, healed from negative thinking that would in anyway paralyze me with fear. When I am confronted with opposition, because it still comes, I throw scripture right back in it's face. I can stand firmly against my enemies with my armor on!
So whatever you are going through, whatever your challenge, struggle or "marathon" may be, know that with God ALL things are possible to those who BELIEVE!! When you give control over to God, instead of yourself, your family, your emotions, your feelings or impulses then He will be able to "do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us..( Ephesians 3:20)". Stay on track and you will finish the race!
Love your blogs and you!! Thank you for sharing your heart. Big hugs!
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely! They are wonderful and I am so proud of the young woman you have become! Love, Mom
ReplyDeleteMichelle I just finished reading your blog and what and blessing and inspiration it was to me. I know God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life. I have known your mom and dad since before they got married at Wesleyan Bible church and I love and appreciate them so much and your grandmother is such a blessing to me. May God bless you and thanks so much for sharing!
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